Back to Boston

After serious thought and prayer we have decided to go back to Boston to bring little Maddox into the world. I will be flying out this weekend or early next week and will be there alone until Jeff flies out for the c-section. We have no set date for the c-section and will just be waiting and watching to see how long we can go before getting Maddox out. There is a ton of fluid, not only in Maddox, but amniotic fluid as well that is increasing my risk of going into preterm labor. At my appointment today Dr. Thigpen said that my chances of going into preterm labor was 100%! YIPEE!! I always tried to be an over-achiever. Anyway, he said the sooner I can get up to Boston the better. Seriously, you should see my stomach...he said there were probably GALLONS of fluid and if my water broke,to watch out. Great. Now I'm going to go get on a plane and pray the whole way that contractions and water breaking can wait until I touch down in Boston. Dr. Thigpen also said that Maddox probably looks about as pregnant as I do, due to the amount of fluid in his little belly. His stomach measurement today put him at 39 1/2 weeks along. He is just so swollen and will probably lose about 2+ pounds in water after he is born and drained of all the fluid. That is very common in babies with hydrops. I know how uncomfortable he must be, but he keeps moving and his heart keeps beating and he just keeps hanging on. He's our little fighter. During the ultrasound today he was making breathing motions which is great! We have also seen him stick his tongue out, suck on his thumb, swallow...all those little things that haven't meant too much in the past are now such sweet peeks at our precious baby boy.

I will most likely be a resident of Boston for 3-4 months while Maddox has surgery and becomes healthy enough to come home. My parents are coming to get Brynna and Tracen this weekend and take them back to Missouri with them for the duration. Keyan and Jeff will stay here so they can continue to go to work and school. I am hoping that they have some fun manly bonding time.
This is so beyond anything that I have ever imagined doing and I am sad that I will be away from my beautiful children and loving husband for so long. It is going to be hard, but I am just so grateful for a place to go where Maddox has the best chance of survival. I know that going to such great lengths is not the answer for every family. I was reading a blog of a heart family today who felt prompted, after much prayer, to not go the surgery route with their baby and just brought her home to spend as much quality time with her as possible. I feel very strongly that we are also being led and directed in our actions concerning Maddox. My sweet mother has shared many scriptures with me of late that have really touched my heart and are so applicable to the trial of faith that we are going through. She reminded me of Nephi, who went back to Jerusalem to get the plates, and had to try several times before being successful, who was..."led by the Spirit, not knowing beforehand the things which (he) should do." But he had faith. He knew that the Lord would bless him for being obedient and following the promptings he received. I'm not trying to get all preachy, but the scriptures have brought much comfort to me during the past few weeks. I been strengthened and reminded over and over of the nature of God, of the power and necessity of having faith in Him. Faith has always seemed like such an ambiguous principle to me, but it is truly a choice and requires action.

I continue to be touched by the many kindnesses that are being shown to our family right now. It is fairly overwhelming, but we are so grateful and are making notes for how best to serve others in the future when our life has slowed down a smidge.