He has continued to need oxygen and breathing treatments around the clock, and is also getting prednisone, which is a steroid, in addition to the steroid he recieves through the nebulizer twice a day. At this point they assume he just has a respiratory virus, that due to his fragile health, hit him harder than it would a healthy child. Initially they were concerned that his heart function had suddenly changed and was leading to pulmonary distress, but after doing an echo and seeing his heart only slightly worse than a few months ago, the doctors felt more confident that he just caught a nasty bug.
Jeff and I have been taking turns sleeping at the hospital. Jeff's sister Kelli, who flew in coincedentally the same day Maddox was admitted, has been helping with the kiddos at home. Jeff's mom flies in today and we are just so grateful for the timing of things. So nice to have some family around.
My parents and two youngest brothers as well as Jeff's dad are coming out Friday to be here for Maddox's baby blessing. We have been so excited to have family come to visit and to take Maddox to church for the first time. He was going to be our first child to be blessed at church - the others being blessed at home for various reasons. We have been looking forward to this special and meaningful experience and being able to share it with our ward family who have done so much for us since August. Once again, things are going to be a little different than we planned, but whether we bless our little Mad-man at church, at home, or in the hospital, we are looking forward to having our family here to celebrate our Miracle Maddox.
I've been thinking about Maddox's life, about the crazy things we have done to get him here and keep him here, and I am just amazed at some of the things we have experienced. Although I hoped we would be at a different point with Maddox by now, I look back and see the tremendous growth he has made and the insurmountable obstacles that have been overcome. His life is nothing short of miraculous, rivaling those miracles found in the New Testament performed by the Savior himself. The blind received their sight, the lame walked and even the dead were raised. No less amazing is that Maddox lives today. God does not cease to be a God of miracles. He lives and loves us and has power to do all things.
I know I have questioned Maddox's purpose in past posts, and lately have been reflecting on some things my mom said several months ago. She said maybe Maddox needs to go through so much to help others come unto Christ and gain a knowledge of Him and His atonement. At the time that really bothered me - my sweet innocent baby boy was the sacrifice made so people would get their act together and choose to do what was right?! I felt cheated and angry. As months have gone by however, I have been reminded of another sacrifice- that of our elder brother and His mother and father, and it has given me a small understanding of the role of Mary. My gratitude for and understanding of the Atonement has increased ten fold. I'm not calling Maddox a savior, but I have recently come to feel peace about his reason for being here. I know that Maddox is a special spirit spent for a specific purpose. What greater purpose could there be than bringing his brothers and sisters to a knowledge of the gospel of Jesus Christ. As difficult as some days are watching this sweet babe of mine suffer, I know there will be and end to it. I know his body will be healed, and I know many other hearts, mine included, can be healed in the process. What a blessing it is to know my Maddox.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Wow, you guys go through so much and are so strong. I really admire everything that you do and how well you handle it all! We still think of and pray for you daily. I hope Maddox will get over this little bump like he has been able to get over everything else.
ReplyDeleteDon't question Maddox's purpose here. I completely understand giving a son to help others. We have experienced similar feelings many, many times in the last few years. He is where his Father in Heaven wants him to be. With the most wonderful family who will love him and care for him and deal with all the madness that comes along with that! We love you guys. Hang in there!
I hope Maddox gets to go home soon, I'm so sorry that you are back in the hospital! Maddox is a blessing, he is teaching faith to so many, including our family. We talk about him with Keegan constantly, and I know it has had an impact on Keegan to know that his friend Keyan is being watched over by Heavenly Father. Keegan never says a prayer without including Maddox and your family, and neither do Zach and I. I'm grateful for your example of solidarity and humbleness - you are someone I look up to so much, Alissa. I love you and maddox tremendously!
ReplyDeleteYour testimony is truely uplifting to me. I cry every time I read your thoughts.
ReplyDeleteOh man. Respiratory viruses are the worst. You mentioned to me that it was likely RSV? I hate that. Especially after the efforts to keep him well with the oh so pricey Synagis. We have had friends who have still gotten RSV despite the Synagis, but it still seemed to work to lessen the long term effects, so hopefully Maddox will pull through this with his incredible fighting spirit. I love how this experience if giving you an understanding of Mary's experience. I have shared those feelings at times. I hope you and Jeff are both given continued peace. How wonderful to have some family close by to help with this kids during this unexpected hospital stay! Any chance you can talk them into letting you go home with O2, the nebulizer, and then just checking in frequently? I hope they will let you do that as soon as he gets stable enough to fight this at home!
ReplyDeleteI know I am a total stranger, but I have been following your blog for a couple months. As I read and follow your posts, I am brought back to about 16.5 months ago when I had my daughter several months early. I was constantly asking myself "Why? Why Paizlei? What did she do to deserve everything she has gone through in her very short life?" As I read your post today, and read what your mom said to you, my mom said the same thing to me about my Paizlei. It is so hard to understand the "why's?" at that moment, but as time goes on and your little miracle develops and grows, those answers seem to come when we least expect it. My Paizlei hasn't had the trials as your little Maddox, but she definately had her fair share of ups and downs and 16 months later, we are still dealing with issues from being a preemie and all of her vital organs not being developed. Each day brings new challenges, but at night when I read my scriptures, I am always reminded of our Savior and I know that my little Paizlei's trials are little and if we remain faithful to Him and to ourselves, we will ultimately be blessed. I have a list of "little miracles" on my blog, and we pray for each one of them and all the "little miracles" we don't know but know they are out there. We will continue praying for your Maddox and hope he will get better and be strong.
ReplyDeleteYou amaze me, Alissa, you really do. I hope Maddox gets better soon!!! We love you!
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